On 8/13/06, Fran wrote:
> It sounds like your baby might be having some
weaning "regression".
Oh horse crap, Fran. "Weaning regression" sounds like some
Freudian BS.
Yes, folks, the famous bird psychologist Dr. Fran has linked
the natural behavior of all Cockatoos to the invented term of
weaning regression. This is presumably where a bird returns to
the time when it was being weaned and taught to feed itself.
If allowed to go unchecked the bird might simply return to the
shape of an egg and then it is lost forever until extensive
bird psychotherapy can convince it to re-hatch itself and
awaken in the bright sunlight of unrepressed mental health.
To avoid the heartache of weaning regression (those of us in
the bird mental health field like to refer to it as WRY or
Weaning Regression Yesireebob)it is recommended to administer
massive doses of Prozac or contact Dr. Fran for her recipe on
homemade seritonin re-uptake inhibitors. (Sometimes called
Birdie Bread).
Early detection of WRY is advisable for your bird. The
medication must be administered immediately. as the only
recourse is to have the egg-shaped bird on a examination couch
and we all know birds don't like leather couches even when
shaped like birds and not eggs (not to mention the patient
tends to roll off onto the floor and that causes further
traumatic symptoms).
Seriously, if a human child of five throws a tantrum in the
middle of Walmart, would the solution be to give the child a
baby bottle and coddle it through a repeat infancy?
Can anybody say, "spoiling an already needy bird?" That is
exactly how you can turn a Cockatoo into a plucker. Well
unless you want to sit in a chair beside the cage for the rest
of the bird's life and hand feed it.
Please contact me for links to websites on Chicken Hypnosis an
alternative regimen for WRY.
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